WORK
3hour shift. Kind of lame but its still worth my time and tips were good.
BANK
Updated my card, which now has those new chips in it. Got paid, paid my bill, & transfered/saving money.
HOME
Kevin Cano stopped by for a life update. Hope everything works out for the best buddy.
Kelvin's mother came over and dropped Brownie off : )
Got ready to go out
BOSTON PIZZA
Kevin Coelho & I had dinner, caught up, talked about everything in life possible. Ordered SOOOO much food & topped it off with desert.
STARBUCKS
Carried on our conversation over coffee & the night ended.
It's not like i've never talked to them before, but I haven't talked to them in a long while. I like catching up with old friends. You learn about them, see the life they live and understand them a little more.
"Talk to people you have never talked to before" - Craig Lock
look into your soul.. what kind of person you really are
H. "..and you have this sort of feeling that they can see into your soul... and I hate that"
J. "Now they see into your soul?"
H. "Don't you feel like animals look into your soul? Like an animal can see what kind of person you really are?"
I was watching Jay Leno the other day and Hugh Laurie (the central character of "House") was being interviewed. They came across talking about a photo shoot he had with a python and how he was creeped out by this animal looking into his soul. It got me wondering what if we could see into peoples souls. Just straight up see what kind of person they really are. No make up, no designer clothes, no nothing to cover up and mislead ones perspective of how this person they are looking at really is. Being able to see all of this just by looking into their window to their soul; their eyes.
Maybe we can see what kind of a person someone really is. Possibly not exact, but relatively close. I say this with first hand experience. This brings me to a day where Gino and I had an encounter for practice. He knew what was going on in my life at the moment, so he knew I was in a lot of frustration and anger and sadness at the time. But the next time we saw each other my life was turning around and everything was getting better. He knew everything was better because he saw it in my eyes and on my face. I got into his car and he said "Oh my gosh you're glowing". I didn't wear any special make up nor did I do anything to my hair, he just saw that I was happy again. There was also a time where almost the exact same thing happened but with Karl, and in this situation he didn't know what was going on in my life. He just said what he saw...
This also reminds me of another time in Toronto with Kelvin. We were at the park waiting for a tennis court to open, when we saw a pregnant woman and her husband already setting up and playing. And Kelvin said to me "wow she's at that stage where she's just glowing". She was big like any other woman going through pregnancy would be, but she really did just have this natural, enlightening glow to her.
What kind of person I really am..
-I was honestly getting sick of hip hop. Everything started sounding like T-pain, or hip-pop, or hip-hop with a mix of rock/punk/house/techno.. I wasn't triggered with excitement when "hip hop" would play like I used to feel. I used to feel this immediate urge to bob my head to the beat, and moves would come out of me like each lyric and beat was the control centre for my bodies movement. That kind of hip hop made me dance, no questions asked, it just did. I was getting sick of hip hop till I heard Blue Print numero tres. Thank you Shawn Carter.
-I like wearing almost nothing. When I'm at home, and it's room temperature on a nice day I enjoy giving my body freedom. Letting my legs move without friction within short shorts or flowy skirts kind of limits. Also giving my arms the ability to indulge in the sunlight that the windows let in. And my upper body covered only by a top that lets the air breeze in and out as it pleases.
-I love falling in love.
-I am falling in love with jazz pianist because it has no limits, nor construction to how a song must be played out. It tells an unpredictable story that you can only hear as it is being played. It moves me physically and emotionally. I swear when I started listening to it, I feel in love. It really took over my body and emotions and gave me this positive Ora and directed my mind to be optimistic. Doing anything while listening to jazz just makes life a little more care-free. Like nothing even matters; just do what is in the moment. It has become another little source of therapy.
-I'm constantly missing my boyfriend and finding so many things that pop up into my life that relates to him. Walking to work I see a little boy and his father taking him to hockey practice, driving around I see "king Edwards" everywhere, at home watching TV Jay Leno is on, and I almost NEVER watch him. There are so many things that go on through out the day its hard not to have You on my mind.
________
But maybe this is all supposed to happen. Maybe these things show up because I'm supposed to miss you because it makes me have these stronger feelings that can only be healed by your love which definitely makes me happy. I believe that everything happens for a reason...
I quote:
"Sometimes people come into your life
and you know right away that they were meant to be there,
they serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson
or help figure out who you are or who you want to become.
You never know who these people may be;
your roommate, your neighbor, professor, long lost friend, lover
or even a complete stranger who, when you lock eyes with them,
you know that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.
And sometimes things happen to you
and at the time they seem horrible, painful and unfair,
but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles
you would never have realized your potential, strength, will power of heart.
Everything happens for a reason.
Nothing happens by chance or by means of good or bad luck.
Illness, injury, love, lost moments or true greatness and sheer stupidity
all occur to test the limits of the soul.
Without these small tests,if they be events, illnesses or relationships,
life would be like a smooth paved, straight, flat road to nowhere.
Safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless.
The people you meet who affect your life and successes and down
falls you experience, they are the ones who create who you are.
Even the bad experience can be learned from...Those lessons are the hardest and probably the most important ones.
If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them,
for they have helped you learn about trust
and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart.
If someone loves you,love them back unconditionally,
not only because they love you,
but because they are teaching you to love
and opening your heart and eyes to things
you would have never seen or felt without them.
Make every day count.
Appreciate every moment
and take from it everything that you possibly can,
for you may never be able to experience it again.
Talk to people you have never talked to before,
and actually listen,let yourself fall in love,
break free and set your sights high.
You can make of your life anything you wish.
Create your own life and then go out and live it!"
-Craig Lock
Life is no coincidence. Everything that happens in our lives happens because they are supposed to happen. They are destine to happened. Ever since "The Big Bang" we've all been following these strings which are "infinite decimal vibrating loops of energy" (a.k.a. the STRING THEORY)
The STRING THEORY explained by Grissom:
(on my favorite show CSI LasVegas)
If I believe that everything is supposed to happen for a reason, then it makes life's obstacles more easier to accept no matter how hard they must be to over come. Then the outcome will be the answer to why this obstacle was put before one in the first place.
ex. LIFE: Kelvin & I are happy together.. yes we are :)
OBSTACLE: Kelvin must live 4 hours away at UBO for 7months of schooling.. dun dun dunnn
OUTCOME: When he gets back it'll make our relationship that much stronger.. ahhh :) all better
I'm just soul into you.
("punny".. right babe?)
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
Floetry - Fantasize
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything.
Said Baby. Said everything and I
I Fantasize about you said everyday
and I want to do just everything
Said baby, said everything.
I wanna do dumb things.
I'm talking: strolling-in-the-park things.
Stealing kisses straddled on park swings in the daylight
while the ice cream van sings little melody for us to move to like
Twa da da dum...Da da da da dum...
I'm talking some midnight dedications of rare groove tunes,
And all across London we're using real names too,
'cause we're not fazed by who cool, who a fool.
See, I want to everything with you baby so
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything.
Said Baby Said everything and a I
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything baby
Take away baby,
See I'll cook you Chinese.
Fake kind of chicken and some mock kind of beef
And we could eat with our favorite uh tune on repeat
We're only lit by those lights that illuminate the street
Now I want to talk to you babe
I just don't fail to speak
Feel oh so stong inside
Feeling so weak
And I want to uhh
Oooo I want to do everything with you
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything.
Said Baby Said everything and I
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything baby
Now I want to run holdin' hands See, I know that we can do this, in a field of purple grass sprayed with green and white tulips under a sky washed orange by an everlasting sunset and you know what?
I ain't done yet.
See, I want to catch a ride off some crimson- colored stallion. We can sail off in a boat made of water, straight into horizon And we could catch a lift on a cloud. That's silver lining's really platinum, But you know what?
I still ain't done yet.
See, I want to- (Wooo-ooooh)
And I was thinking we could-(said whaat baaaaby)
And if you wouldn't mind a little-(Oh yeah-heyy-yeah)
We could finish--(Oh oh oh baaaby yeah yeah)
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything.
Said Baby Said everything and a I
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything.
Baby Floe-sis break it down
Yo I want to go shopping with you, you know
Me and you strolling our of high street
looking for HIS & HERS gloves
just to protect ourselves from the winter see
I want to be on the phone with you for
hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours and hours...
Talking about nothing
in every single way possible see
I'm not worried about your future baby
Because after tonight
I plan on being your history forever
We're going to uh, rename stars
rename animals, colours
And you know why?
Because this planet is ours
So I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything.
Baby Said everything and a I
I Fantasize about you said everyday
And I want to do just everything.
Floetry.
ATM: Kelvin's Birthday
(lets go backwards from here..)
-I'm sitting in Kelvin's house waiting for his arrival back home
-I went to Safeway, for stuff..
-Was sitting at home resting from a long afternoon
-Bussing home
-Trained with Rawb Leo Virn & Shane to Surrey
-Chilled at Rawbs
-Had Mc Ds for the 1st time in 20years!(not really.. but you know what I mean)
-Shopped for Serena's Birthday (which is tmr)
-Trained DT
-Talked to my baby on the phone about my messed up dream
-Got ready
-Woke up from the most scariest, horrible, stupid, maddening, frustrating dream i've ever had
I'm glad it was just a dream.
Mmm can't wait to see my baby :) been waiting a whole 10 hours since we talked!
Ok time to sleep on his bed and wait till he comes. I'm tired. Haha :)
So whats really going on cas?
Been working so much lately. I've taught a class, and worked 5 shifts within the last 4 days. My feet are hurting, and my body needs a better bed. Or i need to stop tossing and turning at night. Its been easy to save the money I've worked for, since I'm too busy to spend it, but he only things I will let my money go on is special birthdays aka Mothers (28th), mothers bfs (19th), Serena's (19th) & Kelvins (18th). Ugh why are their so many September birthdays.
Having a full schedule is kind of nice. Keeping busy with things to help my life take another step forward feels good. Ever since the beginning of September when everyone else started school again I actually felt like "I'm out of high school". It feels good. I look back and see all of the drama, the laziness, immaturity, the unnecessary in everything that was going on in high school. This is when I can look back and learn. Looking back and laughing will come with more time. But right now I'm still in the middle. Its the perfect way to describe my age. Its like 17 you're still in high school, still having the dramatic times with boys and girls and LG and LBness. Then 19 is when you're legal and act like the high school kids but without the labels of LG & LBs and be allowed to do shit all cause you are your own adult. But 18 is right in the middle. I see it as a "lesson learned, yet still learning" type age. Yeah you're still going to do all that rough sht like drinking at that age but you know you're not legal, so you still have to get a boot, but you don't necessarily need to hide it from your parents.
At this age I have begun to be way more open with my mom. My mom knows almost everything I do and lets me do ALMOST everything I want to. I still listen, but try to get my way by being a little stubborn.. for old times sakes ;) But shes a lot more reasonable with me because i've been able to show her that i'm growning up.. not physically but you know what I mean.
Well anyways my life is still on track with dance, but now getting paid to do it. Still working, saving, paying my bills(s). Now starting to go back to school. Oct 5 will be my first day of the REST OF MY LIFE! .... jk. But it will be the first day of school. Unfortunately I was unable to start in Aug due to minor set backs.. and because I really wanted to go to Toronto haha :) BUT its all good now, or for now at least.
Toronto was amazing, and still I can't get over the fact my mom even let me go with Kelvin. But i'm glad she did. I love waking up beside my baby, without a care in the world besides being there with him and living in the moment trying to capture what that moment feels like. Its hard to describe because its not just happiness.. its satisfaction and security. Its HAPISFACURITY. Yeah, that's what it is!
Life's good, and so is sleep. So that is what I am going to do now.
Holy sht what a long ass day!
800am
Woke up beside my baby after the alarm had gone off (btw thnks for staying over : ). Stayed in bed for 15 min enjoying the nice sun shining thru the window and cool breeze coming in making the morning even better.
815am
Headed down stairs to pick out a song and make choreography for teaching class today.
900am
Went up to the kitchen and made breakfast.
915am
wake up my baby to eat breakfast with me.
945am
Boyfriend dropped me off to the train so I could head to work. :( bye for now till you come down or I go visit
1050am
Get to Granville station & start walking to the Scotia Dance Centre
1100am
Start class/work/teaching
(First week of this new program)
1200pm
Class is over and I head to practice. Longest walk I've taken this year (bridgeport station to Fitness Unlimited)!
100pm
First practice of the year for Sickstylz
400pm
Practice is over and head home
500pm
Eat/rest/change within 15mins
515pm
Walk to work
530pm
Start working (@Bigridge)
1045pm
Done work
1100pm
Home free
Fml my feet hurt and I'm tired.
Breakfast and half a lunch/dinner does not give me enough energy thru a day like this.
Oh well..
"Cash moves everything around me, cream, get the money, dolla dolla bills yall."
MONIEZ!!
Ps: great weekend with kelvin.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
"I like this guy"
Haha through out the night Kevin and Hollis kept saying "I like this guy" referring to Kelvin. All I kept thinking was 'so do I' :)
Haven't drank in a while so that busted me up pretty good. But I also know my limit, so I get to the point where I'm wasted and just before puking. So its all fun.
!!Cheers to...
-Kevin's Birthday!
-KELVIN's long 4 hour non-stop drive over here without music from the Okanagan.
thats right..
my babys in town!
ATM
Sitting at mcDs on granville
Waiting for work
Trying to ease my stomach from this weird pain I'm having
Not listening to my ipod cause my head is aching
Looking at the ugly weather vancouver has to offer early september
Not excited to teach, though this is my last tuesday class
Feeling scrubbed out because I'm wearing sweats
Missing my boyfriend
___________________________
Earlier today:
Mother and I were eating a late lunch, or an early dinner if you prefer. We conversed about her ex husband (aka my father) and her past. She was telling me how relationships cannot be built on lies/secrets nor can it grow. Tell me something I don't know.. So she goes on to telling me what happened between them and how her marriage was force on between my mother and father due to another unexpected life they have created. I understood a little more on why or how their divorce became to be. Some things I didn't know before. After the story ended my mother goes on to me and my siblings relationships. She said "I think you're going to be the first one to move out, and the first one to get married." My jaw dropped and I responded with "How could you say that? Kuya and felicia have been together for almost 5 years and ate and nic 3." She told me my relationship is different. And I just laughed. Laughed because I thought that was quite funny because moving out is a question I asked my mom I could do in about a year and she said yes! And Laughed because I didn't know how else to respond. I love that me and my mom can be so open with each other.
Hmm time for work. Time to dance.
Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network
History Channel Ancient Aliens 2009
If you've watched "Zeitgeist" then you might like to watch this.
This is pretty amazing, and i'm believing it.
Watch from 1-9 if you have time.
Its an eye opener, and it makes sense.
