TY: Number Four

I usually get pretty annoyed when people cancel on plans. But today I let it happen without the frustration, understanding the situation that something had occurred. All day, actually all week I was looking forward to today. Unfortunately I had to spare my excitement for another day. At the time I wasn't thinking of that. Because I was all ready and already in the car I NEEDed an outlet. Another way of fulfilling this excitement. So much freedom and no where to go.

I've been following this care-free routine for sometime now, but slowly it has turned into this care-free NEED. I NEED to have fun, I NEED to be out, I NEED etc etc..

"When you let go of the need for any & all outcomes, life becomes a creative, magical adventure."
-Deepak Chopra

I forgot how to let go of what I THOUGHT I needed. What I needed was nothing, and that's what brought me to this excitement to begin with. When I just went with it, I found myself new adventures to face. Creatively I've been riding them, but I'm beginning to think that I NEED to be riding these adventures. So I'm doing what ever possible to keep them going. & that was my mistake. I shouldn't depend on these things I don't need. I pulled a few bad habits from 2009 back into 2010. But I'm pushing them back into the past, and using my new tools from 2010 to make sure that 2009 habits are staying in 2009.

Tonight was a close call to an adventure I almost took a journey on.. Again.

I want to keep my life a creative, magical adventure.

Dedicated to: Jamie-Jane

_________________________

I hope everything is okay. I'm a little worried.

//Can't believe you got me feeling this way.

Sent from my BlackBerry device on the Rogers Wireless Network